I'm your only chance

PLEASE HELP SAVE THE WHALES :(

2009-09-08T01:57:00.002+08:00

gotten over you;

2009-08-17T23:43:00.000+08:00

"A wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream.
The next day she met another traveler who was hungry,
and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food.
The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him.
She did so without hesitation.
The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune.
He knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime.
But a few days later he came back to return the stone to the wise woman.
"I've been thinking," he said, "I know how valuable the stone is,
but I give it back in the hope that you can give me something even more precious.
Give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me the stone."

For you losers that can't find me :)

Movin'

2009-08-10T23:59:00.005+08:00

Here's a treat :)

click on the image for larger view

It's WU-TANG mother fuckers.

"EOTO"

Remember people, Each One Teach One.

I'm moving, for good.
All you haters, burn in hell.

For I'm the M.E.T.H.O.D MAN.
Fuck the world,
give me some fucking hot girls.

Peace, Love, Unity and Having Fun,

2009-08-10T00:25:00.002+08:00

Happy birthday to Singapore.
Fuck it, who care's anyway.

Happy one month to Mr Ong's newborn.
For whatever fuck i say this for.

Session today is another level,
learned about freestyling and not having sets.
I agree with that.
Knowledge knowledge knowledge!!!!!

I'm gonna go do some stuffs now,
I became 1 day dope-r than people who went for the national day fireworks.
Teeheeeeeee :P

Alright, here's a message from the godfather,
I'm here to share and let it spread.

MESSAGE TO THE YOUTH AND YOUNG ADULTS OF THE WORLD

You must seek knowledge: Knowledge is to know and is the foundation of all things in existence. Knowledge is infinite. Knowledge is to know thyself and to know others. Knowledge is to know your surroundings, environment, the nature of life and death, animals, the solar system, the universe, the past, present, and the future. Knowledge is to know The Supreme One.

You must have wisdom: Wisdom is the manifestation of one's knowledge, the ways and actions one uses to make his or her knowledge known. To be wise, you must choose the right path, know right from wrong and teach others to be wise and set them in the right direction.

Understanding: You must have and get understanding. Understanding is when one draws a picture in his or her mind to see all things clearly with the third eye, the mind. To absorb what you get from knowledge and break it down so that you and all people will understand.
With these three elements of life, we must build a better world, teach the young and old, use natural resources to uplift the people, not to make individuals rich, but to put the Human mind back on the right path and get rid of sick racist mentalities.
Peace and Respect,
AFRIKA BAMBAATAA
THE RENEGADE OF FUNK
The GodFather of Hiphop.

THE INTERNATIONAL HIPHOP AWARENESS MOVEMENT KNOWLEDGE.
PEACE.LOVE.UNITY & HAVING FUN.

GOODBYE.

Definitely Wanyi definitely,

2009-08-08T23:59:00.004+08:00

I agree with you,
It's painful to hate.
That's why we don't, right?

"Falling in and out of love is just a trial and error process to find the love of your life"
- Eyu

Thank you everyone that replied to my question i sent out.
Needed that.

Had dinner at,
The Vine Seafood & Steak Restaurant.

K k k, goodbye.

I finally realized, who you really are H.

To : "Portia (don't even think that's your real name, poser)" Tan Jiejing,

2009-08-08T22:53:00.005+08:00

Bboying is a culture,
we have our own style, flavor and stuffs.

Hiphop has 4 elements,
and only 4.
1. Bboying
2. Graff
3. MC
4. DJ-ing

Anything more than that are trends.

And as for "Breakdancing"
it's 2 different things.

Bboying itself has it's own 4 elements, and history to learn.
if you don't have all 4 and the history you aren't a true bboy.
1. Footwork
2. Freezes
3. Powermoves
4. Toprocks

Breakdancers does
Powermoves and freezes,
but not the other 2,
hence making it not full and being called Breakdance.

Never heard of all this before?
Because you are shallow,
Thinking you know all this stuffs,
and calling me/us trend followers?
You "AINT" near knowing our history.

So fuck off,
if not bring your bunch of trend followers and look for us bboy's & bgirl's at Esplanade Underpass.

Limerence,

2009-08-08T00:29:00.002+08:00

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence

Limerence refers to an involuntary cognitive and emotional state of intense romantic desire for another person. The term was coined by psychologist Dorothy Tennov to describe the ultimate, near-obsessional form of romantic love.

The concept is an attempt at a scientific study into the nature of romantic love. Limerence can often be what is meant when one expresses having intense feelings of attachment and preoccupations with the love object.

According to Tennov, there are at least two types of love: limerence, what she calls "loving attachment", and "loving affection," the bond that exists between an individual and his or her parents and children.

Limerence is characterized by intrusive thinking and pronounced sensitivity to external events that reflect the disposition of the limerent object towards the individual. It can be experienced as intense joy or as extreme despair, depending on whether the feelings are reciprocated.

-------------------------

I find this very interesting,
people around me are like this,
they fall for one another,
and get love struck like it's the end of the world.

Many many good examples,
people aren't able to differentiate Love and Infatuation,
that's how they get into short relationships or hook up's.
Which are actually a waste of time,
and many of them take it as a game.

I don't understand how you people feel about this,
but to me "Love" isn't a game.

Sentosa with 2Ao8 today,
it rained suddenly right after i ate the last chicken wing.
Lucky lucky!
k k k k!
Sessioned in the evening,
and home not long ago (:

You changed a lot since sec 1 & 2,
i don't know what has gotten into you,
you aren't that innocent, kind good girl i used to love dearly anymore.
It seems that you are becoming shallower day by day,
thinking that your best friend(s) is/are all god can give.
Who are good or bad isn't what i can do and show to you,
you have to find out for yourself,
don't wait for things to happen,
do something about it before it happens.

Oh beautiful,
all i did was looked at you for 8 months.
If you could do it to me,
you can do it to anyone else,
but you won't do it to him.
No one knows better about everything,
than you and me.

dedication

2009-08-06T23:45:00.006+08:00

To all my friends,
past and present, haters too.

Does smoking give you good results?
Does taking drugs give you a better life?
Does mixing with "that kind of people" worth the time?
Does being a gangster bring you good?

I know some of you are good at heart,
listen to your heart,
never never be like what i was in the past.
It wasn't worth the time being that way,
i believe you people understand what I'm putting across.
Have a dream, follow your dream
and the road ahead you will come clear.

You know something?
I can't stand the sight of you,
you spoil my day.
What's so fun about pulling her hair?
Taking her wallet?
You're just plain lucky to have her back you up.
Jesus Christ, why do you have to avoid me?
Did you do something wrong and feel guilty?
You aren't a gangster so quit trying,
go be a good rich ass mama's boy.
Grow up problem child.
Quit using her,
just because she's a naive girl.
I'm holding back kid,
i don't wish to lose myself.

I feel that I'm wasting too much time on that loser.

Wake up babe, look around and think, who are your real friends and who aren't.
No matter what your decision is,
you have my support and respect.
That's the power of love.

352am

2009-08-06T03:52:00.002+08:00

I'm so so so awake!
First time i slept so early in my life!
Guess what time i slept?
830PM! God damn boring lur :(

Smile through your lips as you lie through your teeth.

I know i promised you,
but just this once,
i have to express my feelings once again.
It wasn't easy keeping things after you left,
for there wasn't anyone i could talk to.

"For better or worse";
A continuing curse...
"In sickness and health";
You'll just get the first...

"Till death do you part";
Life is not short enough...

So this is the thing they call love

There's a bottomless feeling,
That sobriety brings.
So they abandoned their vows
And they discard their rings.

The sweetness of the start,
Leaves a sour ending.

So this is the thing they call love

There's some things you lose
You won't ever recover.
With another day, another dollar
Another heart, another lover.

But the memories remain
Of those you'll never get over.

So this is the thing they call love

I love you dearly,
you know well i do.

injured again

2009-08-04T22:36:00.002+08:00

Lips so soft like silk,
your skin so warm and smooth.
Smile so bright that stuns,
the sight of you seems like autumn forever.

Today was stupid,
i injured my back, and now it's so painful i can't lie down.
How it happened?
Head drills -> Success.
Try again -> Crash and landed on back.
Back -> Fucked.

Slept through whole of today in school,
what a waste.
I have to sleep early from today onwards,
and work my way slowly into a better person.

Love is so powerful,
that even when you're asleep,
when you are suppose to be resting,
your brain ticks that person's name.
It's happening to me everynight babe.

need a life

2009-08-04T00:01:00.002+08:00

Is it fame i want?
self achievement?
I need a life.

Wanyi made me wait so damn long,
she said she'll be on time and meet me at 8am,
guess what time she reached?
818am :)
I didn't even have time to have a proper breakfast lur!
Damn you Ho Wanyi,
you owe me big time!!

Break-ed at RP,
i'm not feeling well again...

Yes bitch, i hate you.
Die in hell!
May you fall down the stairs and break your leg,
hit your head,
suffer from brain damage and memory lost!

Short posts are always so quick and simple but boring.

Wan An.

Seeing you across the hall talking to another guy isn't painful,
because you'll never feel what i'm like now.

never

2009-08-02T23:14:00.003+08:00

Some things we don't talk about,
rather do without just hold a smile,
fallen in and out of love,
the same damn problem together all the while.

Poe 1 , Born & Crazy's workshop today.
The foundations by Poe1,
Hitting beats and freezes by Born,
& Power's by Crazy.

Fundamentals of Bboying.

"You can do something and it mean's nothing,
but when you put your style and flavor into it,
it mean's something." - Poe One, Style Elements / Mighty Zulu Kingz.

Hello there, love.

get hyped,

2009-08-02T01:40:00.003+08:00

Boty was fine,
but looked forward more to the cyphers and battles only.

Congrats to winners,
1st- All Area, Japan.
2nd- Gamblerz, Korea.
3rd- Formosa, Taiwan.

All Area's gonna dominate the world!!!!!!!
Japan all day everyday!

My life's repeating itself,
going back to the same old days,
where everything seems so simple and plain.
Got to admit, it's a good life but sad life.

I realized my love for you strengthens the more we are apart.

Sorry,

2009-08-01T01:17:00.002+08:00

I'm too tired to post,
in house battle today at Bakau.
Practiced till 1115pm.
I'm totally worn out,
i shall post more tomorrow.

Btw BOTY'S TOMORROW,
CAN'T WAIT!!!!!!

Sorry Wanyi,
rejected your date with me :(
I shall make it up to you next time!

For now, Goodnight and sleeptight everyone.
You too, sleep early alright H.

I just wish there was so much more than that, about me and you

2009-07-30T23:32:00.008+08:00

You talk to him, and it burns me like the sun
You talk to her, and you say that you feel like he's the one
I talk to me, but you can't hear the pain I feel.

School's wack.

Mum came today,
talked.
She went to talk to Jesper about sis,
i went to look for SeowYunying,
Chitty chit chat!
She never fails to be around when i
need someone around in school.
Library -> Prd Squ -> Jinggo & HYG -> Watch Seow play vBall
-> Walk with her till spiral staircase -> Find mum at dance room.

Sessioned at esply with Iz and a Australian.
We wanted to go DXO,
because everyone said the extry was free,
happened to be free but we have to buy the first drink at?
At $9, wasted time walking all the way there.
Ended up at esply to practice again.

Homed.

Recently me and HYG are in love with Gachapons
( A machine where you put coin(s) in and when you turn it,
a capsule drops out with some toy's or so in it ).

Cool uhhh!?
Real Gachapon's somemore!
JAPANESE!!!!!!!!!!
Fetish i think!
But it's real expensive,
two dollars for one capsule.
But it's worth the collect (:

Love has the same concept as
clapping hands,
both parties have to trust and
give each other chances,
most of all love each other truthfully.
If neither party doesn't trust love and give in,
the relationship will never be a great one.

The saddest people are the one's who are in a One-Sided Loveship.

if we weren't that close,

2009-07-29T23:08:00.003+08:00

I would never had let you into my heart, if you didn't came with open arms.

If's.

Fuck the school DM,
the sight of him disgust me TTM!

Fuck my hands,
fucking blisters make it so hard to do footwork.

Fuck my male Formteacher,
made of total shit, fuck off.

Fuck studies,
can't seem to study without your moral support.

FML.

Break in school today, for like an hour or so?
School suck big time,
no proper space to practice in.

Had a short chat with SeowYunying about life.
It's seldom you see us talk so... face to face uh.
Thanks anyway.

Sessioned at Esply,
sorta chilling today.
But it's all fine....

It seems like the puzzle is almost done,
I'm able to see where my life's heading towards.

Need to start studying hard like i promised.
After you left,
my bros and Bboying became my only priority.
It will always stay this way.
My first priority will always stay empty for your return.

mixtape,

2009-07-28T22:49:00.003+08:00

"What you see isn't what you're seeing."
Credits - Someone special.

Oh, don't turn around and say bye again,
yeah it crushes my head when you call me
your friend and I'm not the same person
From back in the day in the back of the class
that you thought was gay.
No I can't find the words cause I lost them
the minute they fell out of my mouth.
And it's love and I'm in it, so give me your lips
and just let me kiss 'em,
and let's get messed up.

Skipped school.
Reason?

I woke up in the middle of the night,
checked twitter,
read something unpleasant,
that seriously killed it.
It may seem like entertainment to you,
but it's heart wrenching for me.

Didn't had the mood to do shit,
even messed my hair up,
now I'm with a "Gangster" hair,
fuck the hairdresser.
I'm already being fucked by everyone,
and now this bullshit.

Session tomorrow in school,
evening hopefully having a session too.

Thanks Wanyi.

I never want to see you unhappy, I thought you'd want the same for me.

2009-07-27T22:06:00.004+08:00

I cannot go to the ocean,
I cannot drive the streets at night,
I cannot wake up in the morning,
without you on my mind.
So you're gone and I'm haunted,
and I bet you are just fine.
Did I make it that easy,
to walk right in and out of my life?

I'm not feeling well.
Sigh.
I'm aging real fast since.

Am i really such a big burden to you all?
I'm sorry for being so,
please don't change how you treat others,
i wont bother you all again.
She's your classmate,
talk to her please.
Please don't treat her differently because of me.

I don't come online just to talk to my bestfriend(s),
you can say i hardly even come online nowadays.
I promised you before to sleep early,
I'll set my weekday timing to sleep before 1am,
I promise.

You too please sleep early.
Love you dearly.

after going though so much,

2009-07-26T23:00:00.004+08:00

In truth, you are too intellectual and cold.
A calculator with a charming smile is the description that fits you best.

Every time i have a heart to heart talk with them,
i either get scoldings or lectures.

Bro's you guys don't really understand how i feel,
in my whole 15 years on this planet,
i only truly loved two people.
For a person like me,
i don't just woo a girl if i like them,
if it's an infatuation we are never gonna happen.
From the beginning relationships was never a joke to me.
It isn't as easy to give her up like any other,
for me to give her up is definitely not a want.

You are nothing but beautiful.

"No matter who that girl is,
as long as you truly love her,
she'll always be the prettiest in your eyes. "
- Wanyi

never ever judge a book by it's cover

2009-07-26T00:07:00.002+08:00

I forgive you Wanyi jiejie.

Where are most people when you need them?
They're either busy or not giving a shit about you.
Studies are important i agree,
by not sparing me a few minutes simply tarnish our relationship as friends.

Not feeling well this few days,
appetite loss,
no strength to do stuffs,
slight fever yesterday.
I'ma weakling.

I don't have the energy to talk about you today.
Just those three words will explain it all.

to gain something, you have to lose something

2009-07-25T01:16:00.004+08:00

I don't know you,
i seriously don't know you well.
I still don't believe that 11th April actually happened.
Not in a good mood,
not feeling well.

MMZY thanks for everything since....
you know...
You have been around for me uh,
even though you are stuck in the middle,
i truly don't blame you for stuffs you can't do.
At least you were there,
unlike some people who proclaimed to be a good friend.

Jinggo, i love you v`v much babe.
Thank you too.

Since then,
times have changed,
or you could say i have changed.
Really sorry to people i have pissed off,
but i just don't like talking nowadays,
or interacting with anyone.
Just let me be and stop intruding into my personal life,
you can say all you want,
just stop messing around.

To gain something, you have to lose something.
I lost you, I regretted real badly and changed myself for you,
when i couldn't carry on, you ran off with your friends.
You threw me aside and left me to suffer.
I picked myself up,
I realized you did it for my own good,
I know your good intentions for me.
But you will never never ever change what is right in front of you.
My Love is as strong and powerful as the love Romeo had for Juliette.

Although we aren't of any relation now,
knowing you was the best time of my life,
talking to you over the phone every night,
sharing with you my unhappiness and sorrows.
You were always there to listen and guide me,
you changed me, to who i am now.
You were my eyes, my mind and my soul.

Till this day i still regretted what i did.
You may never give me a chance repent,
i understand, and i will respect your decision wholeheartedly.
I will still wait for my second chance to prove.
You will read this,
you may not feel a single thing.
I'm writing because i don't have the guts to face you.

I'm still living for you LinHuiting.

Jizz on your face,

2009-07-24T00:17:00.005+08:00

Down with slight fever,
feeling very moody today.
Didn't had a good day since 17th June,
Life's fucked for me.

I'm being ignored by anyone and everyone.

I can't stop and i won't stop loving you.

The sight of you makes me puke,
i wanna punch you in the fucking face,
what's wrong with your face?
Doing it on purpose to get me jealous and shit?
Comon' how old are you? Fifteen?
Grow up kid,
making me pissed doesn't gain you anything,
want to make me break down?
Fuck her hard.
Yeah, do it,
you heard me,
so go on and run along like some pussy,
ya boot licker.
You aint a gangstar, so stop trying,
or wanting to be one.
Even MdmYau said that to you last year.
You sure are a big failure in life,
spoilt rich brat.
Try getting some jizz out first,
before you wanna jizz on someone's face.
Mixing and acting like some "cool" gangstar shit in school,
gets you into the hall of mother fuckers,
being a gangster isn't the shit,
wanna know some real shit?
You don't know real shit,
shallow people like you don't really go out,
or even experienced stuffs niggers do.

Enough of wasting 10 mins of my life writing about you.

Hear me rise,
I'm coming.

L,LHT.

prayed harder than anyone,

2009-07-23T00:22:00.001+08:00

I prayed real hard during the eclipse today.

I've a appointment at TTSH tmr,
for x-rays and some shits.
They actually sent a latter to my home,
real gay of them...
Guess i'll be leaving school early tomorrow :(
Sorry Jinggo, not tomorrow( 23rd Today )

My next appointment at TTSH with the bone specialist is on,
5th August!
Sucks to be me.

Wont write much because i'm pissed with myself,
for being a loser and coward.

I promise to study hard,
and make it big in society,
I'll make you proud baby.
You're always going to be that special someone, Love.

I'm not gonna hide anymore,
It's been 2 months and still no word.
I don't deserve you?

I love you LinHuiting.
Truly and faithfully.

Eleven Months.

2009-07-21T23:00:00.003+08:00

The months are still going,
soon it's gonna be years.

If i didn't love you,
i would have given up eleven months ago.
A month more and it would be a year,
tell me what do i have to do for you to believe in me?
So that i can prove to you all that you never believed in.

There will be a solar eclipse tomorrow morning,
Indian Astrologist says it's a bad omen,
but at the same time the best time to pray,
because -

"During the period of the eclipse, the opposite attracting forces are very, very powerful. From a spiritual point of view, this is a wonderful time to do any type of worship.

"It will bring about good results, much more than on an ordinary day."

I'm gonna pray real hard tomorrow morning.

Practice is the only thing that is able to take my mind off you.
Now do you understand how much you mean to me?
I'll pray that things will get better as time goes by.
Love you babe.

useless

2009-07-20T23:54:00.004+08:00

I don't wish to see you,
i don't wish to see you with him.
I dread going for recess everyday,
because i will definitely see him with you.

It feels so painful,
imagine someone you love so deeply,
flirting with another person,
but he/she just ignores and pretend
you're not a bit less of a friend to him/her?

Jizz on him, i hate him.
You didn't know,
when i always see him or any of your friends,
i force to fake a smile,
just to make sure they don't talk about me to you.

You were once my reason to study,
my inspiration,
now you just hit me like a sin.
I want to study,
i want to do well,
i want you to be around to guide me,
like you did before.

I'm falling ill,
i have been pushing myself too much i guess.
Because this is the only thing i can do to keep my mind off you,
mind you i have feelings like "him".
Do you really have to treat me so differently?

Am i really that useless to an extend
which i can not control my own emotions?
Or is it a fact,
that I'm a big fat loser?
I used to believe in Love,
untill you came around and destroyed my cloud of Love.

fml.

2009-07-19T22:14:00.004+08:00

Treasure what you have.

Today went out for dinner with Aunt Selina and family.
Catch up a lot today,
on our lives and relatives.

Had a good chat with Jieqi this afternoon,
she agrees with what MdmYau said.
And this are her words to me,
"Make her regret next time that once,
there's this guy that loves her deeply but she didn't treasure."

You thought me to learn from my mistakes,
i made a huge mistake once of letting you go,
so i wont let history repeat's itself.

demoralised

2009-07-19T00:56:00.005+08:00

Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
I'm closer to where I started,
I'm chasing after you.

Stop looking at someone from just one simple angle.
Try to understand what I'm trying to say,
and you'll get to see the world in whole from there,
by then you'll be able to see everything on a good basis.

What does a good guy mean to you?

A rich spoilt kid who has all kind of stuff people wants but carry himself as a "Gangster" wannabe?
Who goes out with people whom have bad reputations. E.g smoking.
People who have no brains to think for themselves,
and can't differentiate what's right from wrong.

Or...

Someone who's humble in someway or another,
a person who keep's a low profile, just being who he is.
Not a rich kid and have all kinds of friends but only close to a few.
Learns and understands from his mistakes,
he does not like studying,
and blow his top sometimes,
but is able to differentiate right from wrong.
Though he used to have a bad reputation,
He changed over time due to someone special.

Tell me baby.
Or maybe just tell me who do you wanna befriend.

A Loyal and Faithful friend,
but does not have much money to treat or buy you things.
Or someone who is the opposite,
and hang out with "Gangsters".

*Am not pointing fingers or calling names.
So to people who think I'm talking about you,
prove it... with Evidence.*

My Virtue was always to End what i Started.
And never did it changed.

"whisper three words and I'll come runnin' "

2009-07-18T02:46:00.002+08:00

Half blood prince at 1140PM,
ended at 2am,
Emma Watson's such a hottie.
The whole show i was just focused on her and only her! *faints*

During my free time,
i actually wrote a song...
a song about you.
Our short love story that never ended.

Can you believe how short love last's ?

that feeling,

2009-07-17T00:11:00.002+08:00

Late in the middle of the night,
woken up by the cold shivering wind,
nightmares surround my room.
It was you,
you were the cause.

Once a wise person told me,
Faith is the miracle people speak of.

Ever wondered how special and important you are in my life?
How much you have affected and changed me?
That's something that cannot be compared,
with money and everything else on this planet.

I love you.

you are not alone,

2009-07-15T23:26:00.002+08:00

You are not alone,
i am here with you.
-

Everyday when i take the MRT back home, when it passes your house,
it reminds me of the days i sent you home.
I wish time could stop right there,
just frozen for a day will be all good.

I'm a big loser,
i wish i wasn't such a coward.
I know if i want you,
i should fight for you.

I'm scared of the consequences,
I'm afraid to repeat the same mistakes again.
Well, after all you became "Best"friends with him,
I was gone.
I admit,
I'm better than him in every way,
but he has smth i don't.

Hey, you lent him smth,
when i was .... i even begged you.
Who could have stood by you even after what you did?
Me, i still stood by you all along,
till you cast me aside.

I don't wanna know anymore people,
i don't wanna end up like losers in my class.
I just want to live loving one person,
be loyal and faithful to you,
even if anything happens.

You stole my heart when it was on the edge,
you revived it and now you're throwing it back on the edge.
A simple life for me will do,
as long as you're happy.

The blame's on me,

2009-07-14T23:06:00.002+08:00

I deserve it,
for being a coward.
No one's to be blamed but me myself.

Edit edit/

A loser like me doesn't deserve someone so special like you.
-------------------------------------------------------------

I don't deserve you,
but I can't let you go,
I know, I'm the one who said goodbye.

I look back now
and I wonder,
how I could have been so dumb,
how could I have let you go?

I don't deserve you,
but I need to hear from you,
I went insane just not hearing from you.

I don't deserve you,
I wish I could say it to you,
that i honestly love you.

I don't deserve you.
I did too many stupid things.
I promise that if I ever have a second chance
I'd do it all better,
better than you'll expect.

I need to hear from you,
I need to feel you.
as though I did something right
in my history of wrongs.

I don't even know
if you still feel the same.
But I know that you deserve to know,
that I truly do.

I can't say goodbye to you again,
I miss you being here,
where I could depend on you.

I'm ever so sorry
for the stupid things I did
and I don't deserve you.

that's so awkward,

2009-07-13T23:59:00.001+08:00

I sat on the same bus as Q today!
Haha, but it make's no difference.

No Emolimo talk today!
Although i'm feeling down.

You're getting more cuter and beautiful day by day,
guess there isn't anyone who see's you the way i do.
People love judging one another by looks,
one word to describe them, Shallow.

I find it awkward to talk to you,
you know what kind of a person I'm like.
I remembered our promise.
If you still do...

together like forever,

2009-07-12T21:36:00.001+08:00

The days 11th to 30th are still ticking in my head,
it's like it will never stop.

Even with you gone,
my hearts screams your name.
You reign over me,
like none that did before.

Perfect can be explained by one word from me,
"You"

I feel so inferior,
Compared to him I must seem like nothing.
In your heart he wears a crown, your king
Here I stand, just a prince of my own pain
Why is he king when my feelings prove superior?
My life, my love, my heart, my thoughts
You consume them, and tightly to you I cling
I ask for this, logic disdain.
It means nothing what happens to me
My own life concerns me naught
You're my love, my world, my life, the only one I will ever see.

Always think twice,

2009-07-12T01:53:00.004+08:00

You know how I'm like,
it's like how i know you're like.
We both are the same,
we have the same character.
This is something you can't deny,
hope you understand.
It isn't a crime loving you,
but you are not talking to me on purpose.
What do you gain from that?
Just because you want me to give up?
That simply wont work my dear,
it just makes my love for you stronger.

Every time you're online,
and every time i see your name on my contact list,
I have the urge to SMS or talk to you,
but I'm too afraid of the consequences,
you said think twice before making a move,
and think of the consequences of my actions.
I don't want you to be unhappy,
irritated or anything else,
When you're fine with me coming back into your life,
talk to me please.
I will be waiting,
no more than ordinary friends will do...
Just talk to me when it's time alright?

2009-07-11T15:00:00.002+08:00

Arghhhhhh! I forgot what date is my appointment with TTSH! :(
Shitshitshit, i'm in dip dip trouble!

Esply with Fam later on,
Cya niggggz.

My brother's playing NFS Black Edition on the comp,
so fucking noisy.
Lol,
and i'm playing Super Mario on my Gameboy.

Where's the fucking PS3 when i need it the most?

I'm like a no life son of a bitch,
who goes home after school,
bathe, change, get ready and leave for practice,
practice till late, go home, bathe, have some rest,
use a little bit of the comp and sleep.
Not much of communication to the outside world or my friends.
How cool is that for a life? :)
Guess god made me this way,
Anti-Social with little friends.
I don't get why am i such a loyal friend,
but none of them are there for me except for my Fam.

Bitch you losers out there.

Good "O'll" days.

2009-07-11T00:36:00.001+08:00

Went to play ball with my niggz from MFSS!
It's been a long time brothers!
Kc,Xh,Ahhao,Aldi,Edger,Zaid,o1 & Xiaodi.
Along with Jovan and Jianshen( Sit there do nothing only )

I'll think I'll get back to balling with you guys,
maybe it'll help me get my mind off stuffs.
And smoke some dogs in my school. ROFL.

Dota-ed with Jovan at my house before ballin,
ate at Mac, due to some loser who didn't want to eat ChickenRice.

Esply with my fam, just got home not less than half an hour ago.
Veryveryvery Tiredtiredtiredtired!
Blueblack everywhere,
injuries everywhere.
No pain no gain!

Dont get so agitated over a "bitch" like her,
you already called her a bitch,
so dont bring yourself to the same level as her,
by talking about her (:
Alright?

Friend,

2009-07-09T23:35:00.004+08:00

Can we at least be friends?
I just want to hear your sweet voice once again,
and someone to talk to.
Please, if you ever read this.
I'm waiting for your reply.

Just normal friends will do,
not best, not close, just friends.

I have plenty of friends,
I'm willing to give them all up,
to be your friend.
Even my best's.

If you hear me,
please talk to me again.

Eamon -
I don't want you back

Whoa oh oh
Ooh hooh
No No No

See, I dont know why I liked you so much
I gave you all, of my trust
I told you, I loved you, now thats all down the drain
Ya put me through pain, I wanna let u know how I feel

Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses, they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back

Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back

You thought, you could
Keep this shit from me, yeah
Ya burnt bitch, I heard the story
Ya played me, ya even gave him head
Now ya askin for me back
Ya just another act, look elsewhere
Cuz ya done with me

Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back

Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back

Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah

Ya questioned, did I care
You could ask anyone, I even said
Ya were my great one
Now its, over, but I do admit I'm sad.
It hurts real bad, I cant sweat that, cuz I loved a hoe

Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back

Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah

2009-07-08T21:31:00.004+08:00

Even Kitty's have time's when their down.

You know nothing.
Some days that i felt so tired to even speak a word,
i just want to crawl under my blanket to have a good rest,
i really wonder if you were playing with me.

I love someone who i barely know,
someone who i don't talk too.
A person whom doesn't want to talk to me,
or even befriend me.

Something's wrong,

2009-07-08T00:02:00.001+08:00

My Class tee's missing,
my Stussy tee's missing too,
and now my necklace's missing.

Something's not right.

I love you baby.
I don't want anything from you,
simply let me love you.

Life's weird,

2009-07-06T22:02:00.000+08:00

Did not post last night because
i was too into talking to Christine about Q!

CP yesterday,
alot alot alot of hothothot girls!
But cannot lur,
must have a pure mind.
HAHA!

School had E-learning but i fucked it.
:P
Esply with Adriel since 3PM!
He left at 6 & i stayed on till 830.
Hardcoreeee @_@

Swimming/Jogging tomorrow i guess.
Had been practicing for the past 1 week w/o fail.
Time to rest for a day :D

My phone's filled with you,
my most visited site is yours,
i'm going crazy soon babe.

Family,

2009-07-04T23:56:00.000+08:00

Bakau today!
That's my home nigga!
Talked alot, chilled and had fun.
Ate LongJohn again,
walked all the way too Rivervale Plaza to get em,
woooooooooooo!

Tomorrow,
Swimming or Breaking?
You guys decide!
Beep me!
Love you all man!

2009-07-04T12:08:00.002+08:00

Just remembered that he saw some
Maxim Super Models at TGX Yesterday! *Nose bleeds*

Hothothothothothot~

Long Forgotten,

2009-07-04T01:59:00.002+08:00

TGX & WCG 09.
At Suntec Convention Hall.

Esply after that.
Breaked till 1030 and went back with Andrea.

Had a conference with Iz, Ricky , Shermboy and Kel.
Damn hilarious,
I love you guys<3

Take a step,
it's not just to strengthen our relationship,
but to also make things clear,
so that there will be no misunderstandings.

It's not gonna happen,
I'm just not able too.
I have a promised that i will never break.
I'm truly sorry.

INJURED,

2009-07-02T23:45:00.002+08:00

Nice!
Shoulder was injured,
and now my leg!
I cannot even walk properly!
DAMN.

Q, i wanna see you again.
God please stop playing games with me,
I've been fooled twice already,
not another time please.

School.
To go or not to go?

My Brothers.

2009-07-01T23:43:00.002+08:00

Thanks bros,
thanks for chilling with me.
You two talked to me when i was down,
joked with me when i was depressed.
I really realized who i can really trust.

Sick today.
Left school at 930am for clinic.
Reached home around 1030am,
slept till 2pm.

Left for Erin's house to play Games!
at around 3+ ?

Met Wan & Zul at KFC,
Bakau after that.

Pain

2009-06-30T23:57:00.004+08:00

I'm in pain all over,
physically and mentally.
Stressed.

Didn't go to school today,
woke up at 1130am if i'm not wrong.
Left for TTSH at 1230pm.

The Doctor's name is Coooolz!
Dr. Roland Boey.
I'm suppose to go back 3weeks later for another checkup
and take x-rays. Damn...
How many x-rays have i taken already,
uncountable .....
Have another appointment on 5th August,
specialist for my bone or shit.

Bakau after that shit.
Battled my man Wan,
i have battle phobia.
Help please!

I don't wanna go to school tomorrow.
I have my own problems.
So fuck you,
don't ask me why.

GOD, PLEASE I WISH TO DIE,
SET ME FREE FROM ALL MY SUFFERINGS.
PLEASE,
I PRAY,
AMEN.

H or H ?

2009-06-29T23:04:00.002+08:00

Will i go to Heaven or Hell?

In my whole life,
i did loads of bad stuffs,
i tired to repay my sins,
i treated everyone better,
i even put others before me.
I changed for the better,
and promised to control myself.

Heaven or Hell?

People took advantaged of me,
i closed one eye.
They mistreated me,
i closed one eye.
I have nothing more to lose.

Go on, carry on.
You lifeless son of a bitch,
you have friends, i don't,
you have a best friend,
i don't.
I'm not too close to being equal to you.
You're Smart, Intelligent
And you an ignore Love like it's dust.

I envy you,
I'm jealous of you.

Your life is way better than mine.
Please teach me how to ignore everything,
i wish to live a happy go lucky life like yours.

I gave up all i have for you.
I got myself back in return,
but i wont give up,
I am Jude.
Wait for my comeback,
you're never gonna see me like what i am again.

2009-06-28T22:53:00.002+08:00

Yes, oh yes, school's starting tomorrow.
There are pros and cons,
which i shall elaborate.

Meeting JaeKyung in the morning i guess...

I'm gonna bring all my books to school
and leave them under my desk! :P

Stayed home the whole day today,
seriously nothing to do,
everyone's resting today...
So i kept eating for the whole day,
i am so god damn sure i put on weight today.

Tuesday to TTSH,
i will get a time cheat to leave school early!
Jealous not!?
Melissa's fucking jealous.
Envy me :O

Time and time again,

2009-06-28T00:25:00.002+08:00

Slept for 14 hours!

Met Ricky at Jiaxin's house downstairs,
went Nebo,
Arcade and then to esply.

I have a fetish for girls with sexy long legs,
i know i'm weird, Melissa.

Chalet

2009-06-26T20:42:00.002+08:00

First day was uber boring,
we were chilling for like the whole day,
from 2PM till 11PM,
watching TV,
singing songs,
talking crap,
sleeping
&
chit-chatting about our lives.
After 11PM's Prison break,
rushed to EHub to get tix for,
Transformers 2 Revenge of the fallen.
1130 show sold out,
so we caught the 0130AM show :P
between 1130 & 0130,
Arcade -> Toilet ->
Sitting down at the top floor big big open space talking ->
Walking around the empty shopping mall.

Show was stupid,
Fox was great,
Storyline was alright,
Cinema was shit.

Chilled even more after the show,
finally slept at 0630am.

Woke up at 1030am,
swimming at the pool with Marcus,
waited for Ruijia,
went WWW at 1230pm,
out of the time in WWW from
1230pm - 0500pm,
3 hours was spent in the "Shiok River".
1 and a half was spent on other rides.
Went back to sleep for awhile,
BBQ-ed -> Prison break -> Chill somemore
-> Bowling -> Chill more & more &
Finally slept at 0330am.

Checked out at 10.24am ( EXACT )
Waited for the bus to PasirRis staion,
because we were too lazy to walk,
plus the sun was blazing.

Eaten at some place which i dont know how to explain,
bussed back to AngMoKio :P
GSC for 3 hours.
Ate mac & Homed.

Okay, not gonna write more,
too tired :( Pictures are with,
Bobby(Zim), Wanyi, Noraini.

Sayo.
I'm a happy guy.

I'm back

2009-06-26T17:41:00.001+08:00

Yes,
i'm back.
i'll talk about stuffs later on,
after i get back from fam dinner,
at some place in Yishun.

Playboy,

2009-06-24T10:55:00.002+08:00

Got three new specs!
Nicenicenice.

Anyway i'm leaving for chalet,
now..
Zim's house to get stuffs, his dad's sending me,
cl& yj.
Cya guys on the 26'th if not 27'th.
Bye ma`niggaz.

Waste,

2009-06-23T23:01:00.002+08:00

Like seriously man!!!
I haven been using much of the comp,
and my back & shoulder hurts.

Crashed at Zim's house today, from the time i woke up till dinner.
made some food for chalet chilled,
and played Jenga.
Sort of Uno Stacko?

My dear friends are proud of me!
I love you guys!

Wanyi's joining us for chalet too,
i so so sooooo love her for that!

Everyone's so busy!
this time round i hope everything goes all right.
Damn,

& There's the maxican( What Sean&Junyi says) girl,
from TP.....
Ask me if you wanna know, ROFL.

Congrats,

2009-06-21T23:55:00.002+08:00

Congrats to everyone who won today :P

Melissa's lovin` me for asking her to go.
Hot guys, fresh moves & everything.
I'mma nice guy hur.

Wanyi ahh Wanyi!
lol.

Meeting class 2A's council tomorrow to discuss Chalet BBQ stuffs,
we are god damn short of moneh.
Some help will be good.

One love.

A time before

2009-06-20T23:55:00.000+08:00

I was reading up on the chat logs, and i came across ours,
it was real hilarious, how cute you were.
Really reminds me of the days.

But it doesn't matter to me :P
I am Jude now,
I have no longer anything to do with you,
not friends not anything.
Yeahhhh.

I've been through way much more than you,
you have no rights to judge me on the consequences of what i do,
i know what I'm doing,
I'll face the consequences myself.

Don't judge and compare me with other guys.

A new life

2009-06-20T13:06:00.000+08:00

:P
New dairy, new life, new everything.
You are nothing to me anymore,
i wont eat sleep or live for you any longer.
You're just like any fucked up girl you see by the streets.
A simple piece of shit :D